11 MP3 Audio clips from Ghostbusters II (1989)

PLAY ALL 11 CLIPS

Clip 1

Ray and Winston have been reduced to doing kids birthday parties to make ends meet. It's a thankless and frustrating existence, made worse by having to entertain children.

Jason

You know, my dad says you guys are full of crap.

Mother

Jason!

Raymond Stantz

Some people have trouble believing in the paranormal.

Jason

No, he says you're full of crap and that's why you went out of business.

Raymond Stantz

Song.

[WINSTON presses play on a tape deck and the Ghostbusters theme starts to play]

Mother

Come on, everybody!

Ray / Winston

♪
If there's something strange,
in the neighbourhood.
Who you gonna call?

Kids

He-Man! He-Man! He-Man!

Clip 2

Haremeyer is the Mayor's assistant and he's a real ball-breaker. Or he thinks he is. But he's no match for Peter Venkman's rapier wit.

Hardemeyer

Look, you stay away from the mayor. He's running for governor next fall and the last thing we need is for him to be associated with two-bit frauds and publicity hounds like you and your friends.

Peter Venkman

You know, I'm a voter. Aren't you supposed to lie to me and kiss my butt?

Clip 3

For your information, the epididymis are a series of small tubes that collect and store sperm, attached to the back of the testicles. So for Egon, this was a mike-drop moment. BOOM!

Egon Spengler

Hello, Venkman.

Ray Stantz

Hi, Pete. How's it going?

Peter Venkman

Very well. Hi, Egon. How's school? I bet those science chicks really dig that large cranium of yours, huh?

Egon Spengler

I think they're more interested in my epididymis.

Clip 4

The guys have arrived at Dana's apartment to examine baby Oscar and his nursery. So far, they've found nothing. But that doesn't mean their exhaustive tests are yet complete.

Ray Stantz

Nothing.

Peter Venkman

So, what, brainiac?

Egon Spengler

I'd like to run gynaecological tests on the mother.

Peter Venkman

Who wouldn't?

Clip 5

Who would employ Louis Tully as their defence lawyer? Well, someone irretrievably stupid or ridiculously broke, I guess. And the Ghostbusters come under that second category.

Ray Stantz

What can we do? It's in the hands of our lawyer now.

Louis Tully

I think you guys are making a big mistake. I do mostly tax law and some probate stuff occasionally. I got my law degree at night school.

Ray Stantz

Well, that's fine, Louis. We got arrested at night.

Clip 6

It would be fair to say that Louis isn't doing such a great job at defending the Ghostbusters. But he has been a real bonus for the prosecutor.

Judge Stephen Wexler

Mister Tully, do you have any questions for this witness that might have some bearing on this case?

Louis Tully

Do I?

Peter Venkman

No, we've helped them out enough.

Louis Tully

No, Your Honour.

Clip 7

Judge Stephen Wexler is about to learn a lesson in humility. Two brothers he sent to the electric chair years ago have returned for revenge in his courtroom. He's having a brown pants moment.

Judge Stephen Wexler

You gotta do something. Help me!

Peter Venkman

Don't talk to me. Talk to my attorney.

Louis Tully

That's me! My guys are still under a judicial mistrangement order. That blue thing I got from her. They could be exposing themselves.

Peter Venkman

And you don't want us exposing ourselves.

Clip 8

All right. What kind of a sick, twisted, perverted individual sleeps with a jar of psyco-reactive slime? Egon Spengler, that's who. His only saving grace is that he is ashamed of it.

Peter Venkman

Oh, baby! You mean this stuff actually feeds on bad vibes.

Ray Stantz

Like a cop in a doughnut factory.

Egon Spengler

We've been running tests to see if we get an equally strong positive reaction.

Peter Venkman

What kind of tests?

Ray Stantz

Well, we sing to it and we talk to it and say supportive, nurturing things to it.

Peter Venkman

You're not sleeping with it, are you, Ray?

[EGON'S face betrays him]

Oh, you...

Clip 9

When Dana says she needs to put baby Oscar down, she means for some sleep. But there's more than one way to put a baby down. Isn't that right, Peter?

Dana Barrett

Well, how about you on the sofa and me and the baby in the bed?

Peter Venkman

It's a way to go.

Dana Barrett

It's so late. I really ought to put him down.

Peter Venkman

May I?

Dana Barrett

Yeah, if you want to.

Peter Venkman

[To baby OSCAR]

You're short. Your belly button sticks out too far. And you're a terrible burden on your poor mother.

Clip 10

Peter has finally convinced Dana to go on a date with him. A romantic meal in a restaurant. What could possibly derail it this time? His colleagues? Hmm. Possibly.

Peter Venkman

Dana, the guys are going down into the sewer to check for slime stuff. And Egon thinks there may even be a huge surge in c*ckroach breeding. Wanna blow off this dinner thing and go with them?

Dana Barrett

Taxi!

Peter Venkman

Women, huh?

Clip 11

PKE levels are on the rise across the whole city. Zombie taxi drivers are on the streets and... the Titanic just turned up to Pier 34 - 77 years late!

Cop

Lieutenant, I think you'd better talk to this guy.

Lieutenant

I'm busy here.

Cop

It's some dock supervisor down at Pier 34.

Lieutenant

What's the problem?

Cop

He says the Titanic just arrived.