5 MP3 Audio clips from Planes, Trains & Automobiles (1987)

PLAY ALL 5 CLIPS

Clip 1

Del and Neal have been forced to share a double bed in a hotel room. When they awake the next morning, things aren't as they should be.

Neal

Del.

Del

[Mutters groggily]

Neal

Why did you kiss my ear?

Del

Why are you holding my hand?

Neal

Where's your other hand?

Del

Between two pillows.

Neal

Those aren't pillows!

[Chaos ensues as they realise where Del's hand had been]

Clip 2

Owen is a Hillbilly who's come to Del and Neal's rescue. They have luggage and he has a little lady who can press more than she weighs.

Owen

Get your lazy behind out here and put that trunk up in the back.

Neal

Oh, no, no... we've got it.

Del

It's very heavy.

Owen

She don't mind. She's short and skinny, but she's strong. Her first baby? Come out sideways. She didn't scream or nothin'.

Del

Isn't that something?

Clip 3

Neal has had to walk back to the airport having discovered his rental car missing. Not surprisingly, he's not very happy. In fact, he's raging!

Car Rental Clerk

Welcome to Marathon. May I help you?

Neal

Yes.

Car Rental Clerk

How may I help you?

Neal

You can start by wiping that fu*king dumb-ass smile off your rosy fu*king cheeks. Then you can get me a fu*king automobile. A fu*king Datsun, a fu*king Toyota, a fu*king Mustang, a fu*king Buick. Four fu*king wheels and a seat.

Car Rental Clerk

I really don't care for the way you're speaking to me.

Neal

And I really don't care for the way your company left me in the middle of fu*king nowhere with fu*king keys to a fu*king car that isn't fu*king there. And I really didn't care to fu*king walk down a fu*king highway and across a fu*king runway to get back here to have you smile in my fu*king face. I want a fu*king car... right... fu*king... now.

Car Rental Clerk

May I see your rental agreement?

Neal

I threw it away.

Car Rental Clerk

Oh... boy.

Neal

Oh boy, what?

Car Rental Clerk

You're fu*ked.

Clip 4

Flight cancelled, rental car missing... a cab seems to be Neal's only hope of making it home in time for Thanksgiving.

Cab Controller

Yeah, where you going?

Neal

Chicago.

Cab Controller

Chicago?

Neal

Chicago.

Cab Controller

You know you're in St. Louis?

Neal

Yes. I do.

Cab Controller

Why don't you try the airlines? It's a lot faster and you get a free meal.

Neal

If I wanted a joke I'd follow you into the john and watch you take a leak. Now, you gonna help me or are you gonna stand there like a slab of meat with mittens?

[The CAB CONTROLLER, not surprisingly, punches NEAL in the face]

Clip 5

Stuck in a car together, nerves are getting frayed and truths are beginning to be told.

Del

You know, there's plenty of things about you that bother me but I'm, uh, decent enough not to bring them up.

Neal

Really?

Del

That's right.

Neal

What do I do that bothers you? Just curious.

Del

Well there's lots of things.

Neal

Come on, name one. Why don't you name one?

Del

Well, there's quite a few things. You want me to name one?

Neal

Yah.

Del

Fine. Um... you play with your balls a lot.

Neal

I do not... play with my balls.

Del

[Laughs]

Larry Bird doesn't do as much ball-handling in one night as you do in an hour.

Neal

Are you trying to start a fight?

Del

No. I'm simply stating a fact, that's all. You fidget with your nuts a lot.

Neal

You know what'd make me happy?

Del

Another couple of balls and an extra set of fingers?

[Laughs]